WWF No Mercy 1999 UK
Another UK exlusive PPV. In the Attitude Era. I don't know why I do this to myself.
The Corporate Ministry head to the ring to star the PPV. A promo. To open a PAY PER VIEW. What's up, Manchester? Lmao that Shane kept the same promo opening 20 years later. Shane says "No Mercy" at least 15 times during this promo. The Brood, Ministry defectors, Kane, X-Pac, and Steve Austin will all see NO MERCY from the Corporate Ministry. They for real opened a PPV with a nearly 10 minute promo. And this isn't even a full length PPV, either.
Tiger Ali Singh vs Gillberg
First off, how fucking weird is it that WWE tried to run Tiger Jeet Singh's son as a big deal? Secondly, JR says GOLDBERG is in this match. Tiger's pre match promo brings up Indians as cab drivers, and how many millions of East Asians are in England. The actual funny part about Gillberg isn't that it's funny, but that it's full on TNA level pathetic PLEASE NOTICE ME bullshit. Gillberg quickly hits maybe the single worst spear in wrestling history, which does little to Tiger, who hits a neckbreaker right after for the win.
MOMENTS AGO. Steve Austin arrived.
The Brood vs Acolytes/Viscera
It's amazing how much of the Attitude Era was just bad gimmicks and jobbers from the New Generation and 80s rebranded. Fucking Mable, Justin Hawk, and Faarooq Assad. Gangrel, an early Raw jobber. Edge, a former WCW jobber. Christian, a blue dot. Kind of amazing to think that 4 of the 6 ended their careers as being world champions at some point. You'd think "first ever black world champion" would be a thing WWE would have promoted with Ron Simmons. This is exactly what you'd expect: The Brood as underdogs fighting from underneath the whole match, trying to use their speed advantage to their...advantage. This is an unusually long match, going about 15 minutes, so I expect this to be the "workrate" match of the show. Which...fuck. Shane sent Mideon out, and he hit a DDT on the floor to Gangrel. Bradshaw picked up the win.
Steve Blackman vs Droz
What the fuck? Terrible match on any paper you can write it on. Surprise surprise, it fucking sucks. This is the longest 7 minute match I've ever seen. Blackman won with an inverted triangle.
TO THE CLEAVAGE HOUSE. Fucking Beaver Cleavage. This shit is atrocious.
Mick Foley comes out and does his cheap pop promo referencing pretty much everything that has come out of Manchester. This goes on for a quite a while and it's...not one of his finest promos.
EARLIER TODAY. Fans were asked about who is going to win various matches.
Mideon vs Kane
Wow. WOW. Phineas Godwinn vs Issac Yankem. THE ATTITUDE ERA, THE MOST IMPORTANT PERIOD IN THE HISTORY OF THE BUSINESS. Get fucked. Kane hit the chokeslam. The rest of the Ministry hit the ring and caused a DQ. Eventually, X-Pac came out and chased them off with a kendo stick.
Tori vs Nicole Bass
Sable to was supposed to be in this match, but she gave it to Nicole instead. You see, she got sick after arriving at the damp, gloomy country of England. Nicole quickly wins with a terrible chokeslam. This is such a bad show, Jesus Christ.
TO THE COLE. Shane has two words for X-Pac: NO MERCY.
X-Pac vs Shane Mcmahon WWF European Championship
Well, Shane and X-Pac are going to have to save another PPV this year. Pac immediately ejects Shane so he can do his pyro. Lol. He does it again and Shane decides to leave. I'd walk out on this shit, too. THE STOOGES prevent Shane from losing and even throw some punches. DISQUALIFY X-PUNK. Chyna comes out and beats up the Stooges. 2 minutes into the match and already 3 run ins and 3 bumps out of the ring. After Chyna's interference, Shane mostly controls with brief hope spots from Kid. It's nothing exceptional, but compared to the rest of this show, it's 6 stars. A ref bump, more Chyna interference all leads to 12HEGOTHIMNOHEDIDN'T. Then HHH comes out, because this needed more interference. X-Pac hit the X-Factor, then Chyna took out the ref, allowing for a low blow and a pedigree. Shane wins. 2 ref bumps, 4 run ins. Title retained. They beat on Pac until Kane came out.
TO THE COLE. Mankind has another promo. They talk about how Shane hasn't mentioned him tonight in all of his promos saying who the Corporate Ministry is going to take out. CUT TO: The Corporate Ministry attack him. LMAO, Taker puts him in a heel hook. In a backstage beat down.
Billy Gunn vs Mankind
Mick hobbles out . If I remember, his knees were totally fucked at the time and he had surgery soon after this. Even being able to barely walk, he's taking flying bumps over the guard rails and splattering everywhere. The leg is the main focus of the match, too. And it's long. Billy won with a piledriver and the bell rang, but the match continued so he won with a fameasser on a chair.
Triple H vs Undertaker vs Steve Austin WWF Championship No Holds Barred
Can you believe it, an Attitude Era main event starting with shitty brawling no where near the ring? It's a few minutes before they even get into the ring. A completely aimless mess of a brawl. Omg, Taker again does that amazingly shitty heel hook where the heel isn't even hooked and he gets into it like he's trying not to break a hip. This torturous, sloppy as shit sequence of Austin blocking the tombstone > Taker blocking stunner > Austin blocking Pedigree into a slingshot > Taker chokeslams HHH. Lmao. Of course, this also has a run in from the whole Corporate Ministry. And Kane/X-Pac. And The Brood. And Mankind. Oh, and after all this shit, it's down to just Austin and HHH, so Chyna gets involved as well. They both get stunners. Shane then got his ass beat by Austin and X-Pac. Pac and Austin then have a beer bash, which ends in HHH being offered a beer and getting hit with another stunner.
Atrocious show. Match of the night by magnitudes was X-Pac vs Shane and it was just a decent match. This isn't even a full length PPV and is still about as bad as it gets. I'd rather watch a Dino Bravo vs Jim Duggan iron man match.