WWF Invasion 2001
It's finally happening. A WWF vs WCW (and ECW) PPV. The biggest show of all time! Goldberg vs Austin! Steiner vs Angle! Rock vs Booker! Undertaker vs Norman Smiley! Kanyon/Shawn Stasiak/Hugh Morrus vs Billy Gunn/Big Show/Albert. Oh.
Mike Awesome/Lance Storm vs Edge & Christian
WWF vs ECW, even though Awesome and Storm came directly from WCW. Christian and Awesome start out. Mike Awesome was the first member of the Alliance to win a WWF title, winning the Hardcore Championship in MSG. He also caused a lawsuit between ECW and WCW, and was part of a match where a WWF wrestler (Taz) defeated a WCW wrestler (Awesome) in an ECW ring. It was weird. Awesome and Storm are sent to the floor. Christian tries to spring off of Edge's back and ends up botching the first big spot of the show. A bad omen. The Great Blue Dot gets man handled for a while. Huge frog splash from Awesome. Hot tag to Edge. Edge-O-Matic. Christian is bumped off the apron. Lance shoves Edge into Awesome. Small package. Christian reverses it. Lance barely kicks out. Spear to Awesome! Looked like garbage even in 2001. Superkick to Edge. Awesome goes for a running Awesome Bomb. Christian intercepts with a spear, sending Edge on top of Awesome. WWF 1, Alliance 0.
TO THE BACK. Mr. McMahon celebrates the WWF victory. William Regal comes in to inform him that Austin and Debra have arrived. Vince gives him a pep talk for his upcoming match by telling him to be just like George Washington when he SMEARED the Red Coats.
Earl Hebner vs Nick Patrick
Special Guest Referee: Mick Foley
When we found out there would be a WCW vs WWF PPV, did anyone expect a battle of the senior referees? I guess Mick makes as much sense as anyone to ref, since he wrestled for all 3 promotions. Brian Hebner is a WCW ref. Who knew? All the refs are at ringside. This should have been Charles Robinson vs Mike Chioda. Earl wins in a thankfully short match. But what a waste. This is supposed to be the biggest show ever and they have a comedy ref match. Nick gave Foley the business after the match. He got Mr. Socko. WWF 2, Alliance 0
We see a recap of last Thursday, where DDP abducted Debra. Austin chased him down in a limo.
MOMENTS AGO. Debra is stressed out and talking to Mrs. Taker. After Mark gets done with DDP, there will be nothing left. Calling Taker by his SHOOT name was so weird during this time.
APA vs Palumbo/O'Haire
Both teams are champions of their respective companies, but there are no titles on the line. APA right away start knocking the piss out of Chuck. Double spinebuster. Lariat from O'Haire to JBL. Bradsaw returns with a Saito suplex. Faarooq gets laid out with a knee lift. Chuck is tagged in and does his awesome punches. Bradshaw doesn't give a shit and stiffs the fuck out of him. Widowmaker! Spinebuster to Sean. It didn't look that good since O'Haire is a lot bigger than most of the guys Simmons had been doing it to for a while. Bradshaw gets a hot tag, which is cut off with a superkick while he was attempting a fall away slam. The NBT do a weird double team move where Chuck dropkicked JBL into a stun gun in the corner from Sean. Chuck mostly whiffs on a superkick to Faarooq. Bradshaw does not at all whiff on the LARIATOOOOOOOO! WWF 3, Alliance 0.
TO THE BACK. Vince talks with Chris Jericho about the Inaugural Brawl. Jericho makes fun of Paul Heyman. Elsewhere, Shane and Stephanie talk with Kidman. Steph really hates Jericho. Kidman says everything is under control. Paul pops up OUTTA NOWHERE to scream WE ARE LOOOOOOOOOOOSING!!!!! Kidman is going to show why everyone says X-Pac sucks.
Kidman vs X-Pac
X-Pac is the WWF Light Heavyweight Champion. Kidman is the WCW Cruiserweight Champion. Again, no titles on the line. X-Pac is the first WWF guy to get booed tonight. This was really the peak of X-Pac heat. Everyone was so sick of him. They have an even exchange. Kidman then embarrasses Pac and sends him to the floor. Kidman does a baseball slide into a face buster. They go back in the ring so Kidman can take his patented "go fucking flying over the top rope" bump. Pac follows it with a springboard dive. Sleeper! What everyone wants in cruiser matches. X-Pac misses a flipping senton in the ring. Kidman gets fiiiiiiiiiiired up. BK Bomb. X-Pac finds that YOU CAN'T POWERBOMB KIDMAN! Kidman goes for a flying something, only to get caught in an X-Factor. He kicked out! Bronco Buster is countered with a boot to the junk. SSP for the win. WWF 3, Alliance 1. Certainly the best match so far. It wasn't blow away, but it was fun.
TO THE BACK. Shane, Steph, Paul, and DDP celebrate. Elsewhere, Torrie and Stacy talk about the bra and panties match. They're going to fuck the Hardys after the show. "Stace, you have a firm ass." "I know."
Raven vs William Regal
Regal right away starts knocking the shit out of Raven. What a weird styles clash this is. Slingshot sends Raven to the floor. Regal uses the apron as a weapon. Regal is thrown to the floor. Baseball slide and Russian leg sweep into the guard rail. These guys don't mesh at all. Eventually, Taz runs down and does a t-bone suplex to Regal. Evenflow for the win. WWF 3, Alliance 2.
TO THE BACK. Mrs. Taker talks with Mark and Glenn. Vince comes in to pump them up. Undertaker is going to do what's best for Undertaker.
Big Show/Billy Gunn/Albert vs Shawn Stasiak/Kanyon/Hugh Morrus
The Alliance came out to Stasiak's Mr. Perfect rip off music. They probably could have just used Perfect's actual theme. Triple press slam! Kanyon and Billy start out. Electric chair to Kanyon. Kanyon comes back with a Russian leg sweep right into the Stroke. I think they should have had him go back to Positively Kanyon. It would have been even better in WWE. It breaks down. Meat gets hit with the pump kick. Albert Bomb. Fameasser to Hugh. Meat comes in and hits a reverse DDT on Gunn. Hugh pins him. Lol. 4 minutes jobber 6 man tag on the biggest show ever. Chokeslams for the WCW guys after the match. Kanyon got the Alley Oop. WWF 3, Alliance 3.
TO THE BACK. Shane gets Booker pumped up. The WCW Championship looked like garbage. It was way too yellow and looked like a kid's version. Elsewhere, Regal gets Tajiri pumped up.
Tajiri vs Tazz
Two years before, this was a crazy match up. Now it's a mid card PPV match and Taz is a FAT ASS. HE'S FAT! Tajiri sprints to the ring. "Low center of gravity" is code for "has a fat ass". Head and arm Tazplex. Tajiri starts a rush combo which was cut off with a lariat. Crossfaces from Taz. Handspring elbow. Taz blocks an Asai moonsault before it even happens. Taz is both shorter and fatter than Tim White. Tarantula. Seated dropkick. Taz kicks out. Cradle Tazplex. Green mist! OUTTA NOWHERE! Buzzsaw kick for the win. WWF 4, Alliance 3. Another very short match.
TO THE BACK. Jeff Hardy stretches. Matt tells Jeff to end the match fast. RVD shows up and attacks Matt with a chair.
TO WWF NEW YORK. Bob Holly was signing autographs. A fan in a WCW shirt is in line. Holly rips off his obviously velcroed shirt and runs him off. What a bully. I think the fan was actually Air Paris. Maybe.
RVD vs Jeff Hardy WWF Hardcore Championship
Finally, a match with a champion actually defending his title. Big surprise, it starts with an indie respeck stand off straight out of a Lynn/RVD match. Crunchy leg drop from Jeff. Did that move ever get a name? Standing moonsault from RDV. Slapjack! That was awfully close to a Pedigree. That explains the rest of RVD's WWE career. RVD is sent to the floor. Jeff does his guard rail spot. RVD meets him half way and they collide. They head into the crowd. Moonsault off some barrier from RVD. Guardrail leg drop. Jeff gets back into it with a sunset bomb to the floor. Jeff pulls a massive ladder out. He ends up falling from it. He almost went head first before it was actually tipped. RVD gets a chair and they head up the stage. Van Daminator! Jeff went flying off the stage, which the camera man totally missed. Chair assisted basement dropkick. Jeff hits a huge DDT and is now totally fine after 2 huge bumps and a chair smashed in his face. He tried a German suplex on the title, but completely missed the belt. Jeff misses the Swanton. RVD hits the Five Star Frog Splash. New champion! WWF 4, Alliance 4.
TO THE BACK. Vince talks with Kurt Angle. "Enough of this Americana BULLSHIT!" "You know what I did in the 1996 Olympics? I kicked some serious ASS!" Kurt is fired up tonight.
Stacy/Torrie vs Lita/Trish Stratus
Bra and Panties Match
I don't think we need play by play for this. WWF girls win. I don't like bra and panties matches. They take all the sexiness out of hot girls undressing each other. WWF 5, Alliance 4.
TO THE BACK. The Alliance gets one final hype before the Inaugural Brawl. Elsewhere, Vince talks to Austin and Debra. This is the OLD Stone Cold. Not guitars, no hugging, no singing. Just cans of whoop ass.
Team WWF vs Team Alliance
Dudleys/Rhyno/Booker/DDP vs Kane/Taker/Jericho/Austin/Angle. You'll note that 3 of the Alliance members were WWF guys for months (Rhyno) or a year and a half (Dudleys) before the Invasion started. The match starts as a brawl on the floor before Austin even gets out. BY GOD IT'S A SLOBERKNOCKER! Austin and Rhyno officially start the match. Remember when Rhyno came in and got a massive push? Jericho gets tagged in and continues the beat down. He gets stuck in the corner and everyone gets some shots in. Jericho recovers and makes Rhyno and Booker look like shit. Angle stomps a mud hole in Booker. Book tags out to D-Von. Kurt tags to Kane. Side slam. So far, this has been exactly what you'd expect with WWE guys making the Alliance dudes look like shit. DDP wants in while Taker is down. DDT. Michael Cole and JR were doing commentary tonight. They're a weird combo. JR buries the spinarooni. Taker his a DDT. Austin is back in. Book shoves off a stunner. The only WWF guy to get beat up is Jericho. There's really not a lot going on here for a giant 10 man tag, but at least the crowd is super into it. I have a feeling we're about to have some rapid fire eliminations. Kanyon Cutter to Angle. BANG! Cole called it a neck breaker. It breaks down with everyone brawling. Rhyno accidentally GORE GORE GORES Booker. Undertaker gives Charles Robinson the Last Ride. Maybe this isn't an elimination match. Austin is down with a hurt knee. D-Von is chokeslammed through the announce table. Kane is double suplexed through the other one. Jericho jumps off the apron, sending Rhyno into a table that was leaned against the guard rail. Kurt is the only WWF guy left standing. He gets Booker in the ankle lock. Austin throws the ref in, gives Angle the stunner, and puts Booker on top of him. Austin has turned on the WWF. SWERVE! BY GOD WHAT A SWERVE! Team Alliance wins and now has the WWF Champion in their group.
DQ Count: 0 out of 10 matches. The official score was a tie at 5 matches per side, but the Alliance won a title and the main event, while the WWF side won a bra and panties match and a referee match.
Man, this is about as underwhelming as you can get. All night long, the WWF guys made the Alliance guys look like shit, only losing by cheating or cheap shots (except for Kidman and RVD). The main event only featured 2 guys who actually came over from the WCW buy out. In that match, the WWF guys dominated the bulk of the match and lost when the biggest WWF guy switched sides. If the Invasion angle wasn't already dead in the water before this show, it definitely was after.