WCW Monday Nitro 1/24/00
In Memory of Bobby Duncum Jr.
TO THE BACK. FOUR limos arrive. BUT WHO WAS LIMO?!?!?! BUT WHO WAS LIMO?!?!? BUT WHO WAS LIMO?!?!?! BUT WHO WAS LIMO?!?!?!?!?!?! It's the nWo! Scott Hall has returned! And he's with Victoria!
Kaz Hayashi vs Psychosis
This is a tournament match to crown a new WCW Cruiserweight champion. "It doesn't matter where we are, because The Juice is in the house, and the house is with The Juice!" Lol. Kaz was not impressed with Juvi's Rock impression. Oklahoma has relinquished the title for no given reason. The heavyweight championship is now also vacant, with Bret Hart's concussion stemming from Starrcade having forced him out of action for an indeterminable amount of time (SWERVE: he'd never return). This is reasonably back and forth, although a bit awkward. Hypno starts with some leg work after a few minutes, then the match just kind of grinds to a halt with lots of standing around and no action. Kind of feels like they're waiting for a run in that has missed his cue. Lol, Hypno does a normal Irish whip, and Kaz just falls over the top rope. The fuck is going on here? This match is awkward as fuck. Psychosis wins with a reverse prawn hold, which had something of a quick count and Kaz looking like he kicked out. Maybe Kaz had a concussion.
Big show tonight: Sid Nash for the title! Sid vs Jeff Jarrett happens before that match, though, and if Jeff wins, Nash becomes champion. Finlay/Knobs vs Mamalukes for the titles. Booker vs Lex. Kidman vs Vampiro.
TO THE BACK. Terry Funk and Arn Anderson head to the ring. Elsewhere, The nWo are hanging out in the locker room. Nash says that Double J has failed his physical and can't compete tonight. Elsewhere elsewhere, Funk is put into a hardcore match with Bam Bam.
The Wall vs Kid Romeo
This doesn't seem very fair. Kid Romeo is literally half as big as Wall. Kevin Nash has placed a $15K bounty on Terry Funk's head tonight. Romeo gets a weird amount of offense before falling to the chokeslam. I think Kid Romeo got more offense on Wall than Kidman did at Souled Out.
TO THE MEAN GENE. Gene speaks with Sid about his title opportunity tonight. Roadblocks don't stop Sid, for he is like a monster truck out of control.
TO THE BACK. Bam Bam gets warmed up. Arn tries to convince him to stick together with WCW instead of doing Nash's bidding. For $15K, Bam Bam would wrassle his MOTHA. Elsewhere, The Two Scotties talk about what their women want to see tonight: Blood and Guts. Hall's delivery of the his lines is fucking hilarious. Dude absolutely hates being back already.
Shannon Moore vs Norman Smiley
Norman is dressed as the catcher for the Dodgers tonight. Norman has a new edge to him, having more courage now that he's fighting a boy band instead of Meng and Finlay. Shannon hits a crazy Asai moonsault, which was really his only offense in the match. Norman wins with the crossface chicken wing.
TO THE BACK. TTS and their women head to the ring with Al Greene. Elsewhere, Nash asks which Harris Bro will step up and replace Jeff tonight. The answer is: Don.
Al Greene vs Tank Abbott
Tank wins in about a minute with the KO punch. On his way out, he shares some words with Big Al, a guy who used to be part of Tank's entourage in UFC.
TO THE BACK. TTS and their womenfolk have a nice giggle about what happened to Al.
TO THE BRAIN. Bobby has left the announce table to get some words with Big Al. "There's got to be a history between you two." "Let's just say Tank and I have a real long history." Lol. Big Al is sick to his stomach and calls Tank a sell out.
The Cat comes to the ring to talk about his injury. He's back to beat the hell outta everyone. Including you, fat boy.
TO THE BACK. Al Greene is loaded into an ambulance. Elsewhere, Bam Bam heads to the ring.
Bam Bam Bigelow vs Terry Funk Hardcore Match
Bam Bam attacks Terry as Terry was walking around the back. Bam Bam wraps a noose around Terry's neck and drags him to ringside. Bam Bam I guess decides he's going to try to destroy Terry's shoulder, just fucking blasting it repeatedly with a chair. He's an old man, for fuck's sake. Funk gets some offense with punches, then does an Asai moonsault, landing on a ringside speaker, then chilling with his face right on Bam Bam's dick for an awkwardly long amount of time. They continue to brawl for a bit until Finlay and Knobs hit the ring. Knobs slides a chair on Funk as Bam Bam was doing a diving headbutt. They put Funk on top of Bam Bam. Funk wins! Funk wins! Terry Funk tells Nash he's going to be a thorn in Nash's side for the rest of his life. He's bringing reinforcements to Thunder.
TO THE BACK. Sid and The Harris Brothers head to the ring.
Sid vs The Harris Brothers
Who didn't see this coming? Sid dominates one of the brothers, throwing him into the crowd. Well, which one is he facing? I thought this was now a handicap match? I guess not. Might as well be, considering twin magic and all that. Sid chokeslams one and powerbombs the other to win. He's heading to the main event!
Kidman vs Vampiro
This should be an entrance theme on a pole match. Obviously this isn't a 1:1 comparison, but this kind of reminds me of Austin vs Dustin in 1992. Two guys on the rise that have started to catch on with the crowds, and everyone is getting the feeling they're going to be the future of the company, only for mismanagement and old dudes ruining the direction of the company. I mean, lol at what actually happened, but there is a neat "this is the next gen" kind of vibe to this match. YOU CAN POWERBOMB KIDMAN! In fact, it's the first move Vamp does. David and Cortney (Cox) Arquette are sitting in the front row, enjoying the show. LMAO, Brain throws out a Killer Karl Kox reference when he saw Cortney. "That's Killer's daughter?!?!" Vamp uses a lot of power moves, Kidman has to use his speed advantage. There are some awkward exchanges. Maybe that's going to be a theme on this show. Or WCW 2000 in general. YOU CAN'T POWERBOMB KIDMAN! But then YOU CAN POWERBOMB KIDMAN, AGAIN! Vamp attempts a superbomb, but Kidman countered it with a super rana to get the win. So, in the end, YOU CAN'T POWERBOMB KIDMAN!
TO THE BACK. Arn is on the phone with, presumably, Ric Flair, as Terry Funk ices himself. Whoever Arn called, he'll be in Vegas for Thunder. Elsewhere, Nash is getting a massage. "It's all part of the plan."
TO THE MEAN GENE. Gene is with Vampiro. The audio is completely fucked, so the interview is cut short.
The Total Package vs Booker T
Lex cuts a promo on Stang, saying how he's getting bigger and stronger every week that Sting doesn't show up to face him. You know, when Lex is bragging about himself, he's actually a pretty solid promo. No one has a physical record like Lex has had for the past 14 years...not even Hulk Hogan. Booker dominates the early going. Brain compares Booker to a ball point pen, to accentuate his athleticism. Lol. Tony was taken aback by it. There's been a weird audio issue the whole show, like feedback from a speaker. It's annoying as fuck. Lex takes a cheap shot to get in control, and the match gets really boring during that. Booker FIRES UP and has the match won, but Liz distracts the ref. Midnight chased her away, but Stevie and BIG T attacked Booker during the mess. Lex puts the unconscious Booker in the torture rack for the win. Sting's music starts. It appears that Sting is on the ramp, pointing towards the ring. Then, the figure vanishes.
TO THE MEAN GENE. Gene and Vamp retry their interview. "If I didn't know better, I'd say the WWF might have sabotaged my microphone." Vamp seems to challenge Kidman to a rematch on Thunder.
David Flair, Crowbar, and Daffney come to take over the announce table.
The Mamalukes vs Fit Finlay/Brian Knobs WCW Tag Team Championships
Crowbar is doing his Gordon Solie impression. Fuck this match. Fuck the commentary. Fuck it all. Unless Finlay just starts beating the shit out of everyone, I'm not interested. Ms. Hancock comes out to take notes. This causes David to dance on top of the table. Daffney didn't seem to appreciate it. Vito pins Finlay after some bullshit. Titles retained.
TO THE BACK. Nash and Jeff head to the ring.
Kevin Nash vs Sid WCW Championship
Before the match, Commissioner Nash makes the powerbomb illegal, and goes further to say that if Sid uses the move, Nash will automatically be awarded the championship. Sid starts the match by immediately slamming and leg dropping Nash. Good strategy. Make Nash take a bump and hit Hogan's finish. Didn't work, though. Nash uses his size advantage for leverage, then things head into the crowd. Naturally, there's a ref bump. This brings out Double J. Sid takes the guitar and hits Nash, then sells it himself so the ref thinks he got hit. VIVA LA RAZA! Sid wins! New champion.
A busy show, certainly. Commissioner Nash is absolutely terrible and I can't wait for that angle to end. Sid winning the title via OUT SMARTING the nWo is an interesting character development for him.